If through the influence of disturbing emotions, you point out the faults of another Bodhisattva, you are diminished, so do not mention the faults of those who have entered the Great Vehicle. This is the practice of Bodhisattvas. 

We create very strong karma with objects like the Buddha, the Dharma and the Sangha, including both high and low-level Bodhisattvas. Bodhisattvas dedicate every moment of their existence to the welfare of all sentient beings, so our minds have to be in a really bad state to see them as an enemy. We do not usually know who a Bodhisattva is and who is not, so if we see someone doing something that seems counterproductive or even negative, we should always comment on the behaviour and not the person. Rather than saying their behaviour is wrong, we can say that it does not make any sense to us, or it does not correspond with the general Buddhist approach. 

First, we need to look at our minds to make sure we are not intending to demean or embarrass others, hurt their feelings, or make ourselves look better than them. We can always ask the person whose behaviour has agitated us for clarification and listen to whatever he or she has to say with an open mind. A lot of the judgment and criticism in our minds comes from getting involved in stuff that we really do not need to, so we can be like a bee that goes from flower to flower, taking what is sweet but not damaging anything. It is about directing our focus inwards at our own body, speech and mind, rather than outwards at what other beings have or have not done. 

It is much easier to see others as kind and be kind in return when we have a clear mind that does not project so much onto others. Sometimes we have difficulty discriminating between pointing out somebody’s faults with a negative mind and speaking about the person’s difficulties with a caring mind. If others told you about a problem they are having that does not seem to be getting better, relating their difficulties to someone who can actually help them can be an act of kindness. If somebody is about to do something 78 | February February | 79 negative and you cannot intercede, you can tell another person who can help in order to prevent harm to the person and others. 

Relating an incident that happened between you and another person to a third party is only okay if your principal motivation is working through your negative reactions and mental states. Speaking negatively about somebody because we want to ruin the person’s reputation and get everybody on our side diminishes us on many levels. I find it hard to trust people who trash others behind their backs because they are probably going to do the same to me. Spending a lot of time picking out the faults of others creates a lot of negative karma, which diminishes our Dharma practice, as well as our love and compassion. Instead, let us use our speech to create harmony and address things directly with the person we have a problem with, whether privately or in a community setting if things might get tense. 

“365 Gems of Wisdom” First Volume (January — March) e-book is out now!