February 3 : Enduring Painful Experiences

Even if a person for whom you have cared like your own child regards you as an enemy, cherish him specially, like a mother does to her child who is stricken by sickness. This is the practice of Bodhisattvas. 

People we have cared for deeply turn their backs on us and see us as their worst enemies. If we are going to practise the Bodhisattva path, we must be able to endure painful experiences like this without our minds getting totally bent out of shape and falling into anger, self-pity, self-righteousness, or any of the usual things we do when sentient beings are not behaving as we think they should. 

We can reflect on how the mistreatment we have received is our own negative karma ripening, and how the afflictions lead all sentient beings, including ourselves, to do and say outrageous things. If we spend just a couple of minutes, we can also probably think of times we have treated people who cared for us like an enemy. We do not always appreciate our parents during our growing-up days and we probably gave them a lot of headaches. Accepting others’ kindness and generosity but later turning on them can happen in friendships, work relationships, student-teacher relationships, and so on. Should someone turn against us, we can use the opportunity to reflect on times we have done something similar. We can generate regret, and make amends by calling up or writing to whoever we have offended to apologise. 

We can also view the person who betrayed us as a child with a raging fever whose mind is out of control. The child may be kicking and screaming and calling his mother names, but she does not take it personally and keeps looking after him with a lot of love. In the same way, we can have love and compassion for people who turn against us because their mind is overwhelmed by afflictions. 

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