Harsh speech is when you say things that are hurtful to other people. It includes when we are angry, and we yell and scream. You can also use harsh speech in a very pleasant tone of voice, the way it often happens in families when you know something that somebody is sensitive about, and you say it ever so sweetly that you know is going to get to them.

It can be things that put people down, that ridicule them. We also have to be careful what we say to kids. I notice sometimes adults really do not speak so well to kids, in the sense of putting them down, criticising them, and telling them they are stupid. Or playing on their gullibility, making them afraid by telling them there is a boogieman who is going to come to get them. Kids get very afraid, and I consider that harsh speech as well.

It is something we really have to look out for especially when we get angry, because harsh speech just comes out of our mouths before we even know what is going on. Doesn’t it? Sometimes we say the worst things to the people we care the most about. It is really something to try and be careful of.

Harsh speech has four parts to be a complete action of having the power to throw a rebirth: 1) The object, to whom you are speaking, 2) The motivation, which includes recognising that object and having the intention to speak those words, 3) Having an afflicted state of mind — sometimes we speak harsh words out of attachment, or ignorance, but mostly it is out of anger, and 4) The action of speaking and the conclusion of the action, which is that the other person understands.

Harsh speech not only harms others, but it also harms ourselves. So, we must remember that every time we hurt somebody else’s feelings with a bad intention, we are putting negative karma on our minds. Sometimes we do not have a bad intention but they are super sensitive. In that case that is not our responsibility, we do not create bad karma.

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